But first, a housekeeping note: Readers who emailed me at any time in the past few months, please read this.
OK, Radio Derb. I have a segment on the horsemeat scandal that has now metastasized from its original source in the British Isles to the rest of Europe. Although:
As you can see, I don't have a whole lot to say about this. One of my listeners does, though. His name's Michael, and he sent me an email which I shall read to you in full. Long quote:
"Mr. Derbyshire: Please comment in your ineffable manner on the nay-sayers in your country of origin who object to the way certain processed foods have been horsed around with. I think it behooves you to do so, even though I am filly aware you've long since left those stamping grounds. So please bridle your reluctance to return to the foal and put yourself in their shoes. As you may discern, I am champing at the bit to make hay of this topic but I lack your soapbox. Very equinely yours . . . etc."
Obviously Michael thinks he can saddle me with the responsibility to pony up a few double entendres. He seems not to know that I have reined in that tendency because I got tired of getting emails from listeners who nag me about it.
If I were feeling my oats I might none the less be spurred to respond. As things are, I decline to stirrup trouble with listeners by jockeying for advantage like some hack politician running for mare.
No, I shall leave the double entendre situation as it currently is: stable. [Clip: Roy Rogers, "Four-Legged Friend."]
Just trying to enter into the spirit of the thing there. I hope nobody thinks I rode roughshod over Michael.