Racial Reality Catches Up to the Onion, Onion Keeps Straight Face
June 30, 2011, 03:46 AM
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If you've ever wondered what it'll take for the media to report on racial reality, you can cross "when racial reality comes right up to a journalist and breaks her damn leg" off the list.

Emily Guendelsberger, 27, an editor for the Onion's A.V. Philadelphia (the A.V. section, unlike the deliciously satirical main section, is non-fiction), was attacked by what the MSM is calling a "flash mob" but what everyone else is calling gangs of young blacks.

The Onion itself is ignoring race:Newswire | A.V. Club editor injured in "flash mob" attack in Philadelphia

Guendelsberger is also apparently ignoring race, tweeting that 1) her boyfriend isn't white, therefore, no hate crime 2) some in the mob tried to help her, so hey, it's all good, and really, let's focus on the heroes here! 3) my roommate in the hospital is, like, too into Jesus.

Of course, the woman is — or was — in the hospital, so I'll cut some slack. Maybe she'll have a juicy, honest, first-hand account down the road. We'll see.

Meanwhile, commenters understand perfectly well that the attackers are black.

Emily Guendelsberger: Onion editor hurt in Spring Garden attack, Metro, June 27, 2011
Authorities in Philadelphia — as well as the many other locations where gangs of young blacks have viciously attacked whites — should be investigating hate crimes. Are they? Call them and ask.

Now, I've always loved the Onion. Whoever came up with "New Crispy Snack Cracker to Ease Crushing Pain of Modern Life" is a comedy genius. And the Onion is often bitingly funny in ways that might irritate the left, right, and radical right.

But a too-heavy dose of racial reality might just be too much for the now-more-corporate Onion to handle.

Once upon a time, for instance, they had a satirical guest column titled "My Baby Don't Want No Medicine." The pictured "author" was a black woman, and the article mocked the attitude of a black ghetto mama. Later, after the Onion gained more fame, the exact same column was accompanied by a picture of a white woman wearing a bandana on her head.

It was obvious what was going on, and the comedy effect was lost. Brutally honest satire has its limits, you see.