Of course, Leno actually lives in California, one of the hardest hit states.
You've probably heard this one:
You read about all these terrorists - most of them came here legally, but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as long as 10-15 years.On Friday he did this one:
Now, compare that to Blockbuster: you're two days late with a video and those people are all over you. Let's put Blockbuster in charge of immigration.
President Bush has indicated that the President of Iran will receive a visa to come to the United States. I'm as shocked as you. You still need a visa to come to the U.S.? I thought they did away with that stuff years ago. Newsmax One Liners, August 12, 2005TWO JOKES (Quoted in a deeply stupid piece in the LA Times: (One More Embrace, Then Slam the Door , May 1, 2005)
Hundreds of private citizens will begin patrolling the Mexican border starting this weekend to try and stem the tide of illegal immigration into this country....Unfortunately, the pay is so low, the only people signing up are illegal immigrants who are already here.For your edification, I've collected some more. Enjoy!
—Jay Leno, March 31
I was reading some interesting facts about the new pope, Pope Benedict XVI. According to the New York Post, the new pope has never had a driver's license. Hey, he should come to California. He's an immigrant. We'll give him one for free.
— Jay Leno, April 22
President Vicente Fox visited Arizona and demanded that we make immigration easier. As Jay Leno says, "How? By installing moving walkways?"
"A Washington think tank has concluded that the job of finding and removing all the illegal immigrants from the United States would cost $200 billion and take over five years. Unless we hired illegal immigrants. That would cost us a tenth of the price."
Hurricane Emily is hitting Mexico pretty hard. Luckily everyone down there is already up here.