At an elementary school in Bristol, five boys were cast as monkeys in the annual school play—three were White and two were Black.

According to Lorraine Rees, the mother of one the Black boys, casting her son as a monkey was an act of racism.

She told the BBC,

"Everyone is aware of the racist connotations of asking a black pupil to play a monkey."

She added,

"I think what the school have done is definitely racist and should never have been allowed to happen in the first place. It is just not acceptable."

[Head denies racism over school play by Alexandra Smith 6/23/06]

Good grief! Anybody who has raised children or even met one knows that this is absolute rubbish! If there is a school play in which there are monkeys involved, those are the most coveted roles!

When asked, the headteacher Helen Heap said,

"Children here were given a choice and chose their roles and there was no act of racism."

Of course her son chose the role!

Just to strengthen my position, I conducted a very scientific, one question poll of about ten kiddies from this age group. The results would be enough to appease even the Southern Poverty Law Center—and they would probably call God a racist (and sue him) for making the whites stripes bigger than the Black stripes when He created the Zebra.

This was the question: If there was a school play with monkeys, bears, lions and snakes which animal would you like to be?

ALL OF THEM SAID MONKEY!!!

(Results are based on live interviews conducted throughout the morning of June 28th. Participants consisted of six White and three Black children. When asked what race she was, the 10th child responded "I run really fast." Then she added "So can I be a monkey?" However, to protect the integrity of the poll, she was Asian. The maximum margin of sampling error is +/- 3 percentage points.)